Baking and Babies
(Chocoholics #3)
by Tara Sivec
Other books by Tara Sivec
Romantic Comedy
The Chocolate Lovers Series:
Seduction and Snacks (Chocolate Lovers #1)
Futures and Frosting (Chocolate Lovers #2)
Troubles and Treats (Chocolate Lovers #3)
The Chocoholics Series:
Love and Lists (Chocoholics #1)
Passion and Ponies (Chocoholics #2)
Tattoos and TaTas (Chocoholics #2.5)
Romantic Suspense
The Playing With Fire Series:
A Beautiful Lie (Playing With Fire #1)
Because of You (Playing With Fire #2)
Worn Me Down (Playing With Fire #3)
Closer to the Edge (Playing With Fire #4)
Romantic Suspense/Erotica
The Ignite Trilogy:
Burned (Ignite Trilogy Volume 1)
Branded (Ignite Trilogy Volume 2)
Scorched (Ignite Trilogy Volume 3)
New Adult Drama
Watch Over Me
Contemporary Romance
Fisher’s Light
Worth the Trip
Romantic Comedy/Mystery
The Fool Me Once Series:
Shame on You (Fool Me Once #1)
Shame on Me (Fool Me Once #2)
Shame on Him (Fool Me Once #3)
Psychological Thriller
Bury Me
Baking and Babies (Chocoholics #3)
Copyright © 2015 Tara Sivec
eBook Edition
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This is a work of adult fiction. The author does not endorse or condone any of the behavior enclosed within. The subject matter may not be appropriate for minors. All trademarks and copyrighted items mentioned are the property of their respective owners.
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For Buffy –
You were right; I had nothing to lose. I love you, asshole.
Table of Contents
Title Page
Other books by Tara Sivec
Copyright Page
Dedication
Prologue
Chapter 1 – Can I Get A Woohoo?!
Chapter 2 – Satisfaction and Sugar
Chapter 3 – Soup
Chapter 4 – Toxic Spooge
Chapter 5 – Thug Mug
Chapter 6 – Cream Puff Balls
Chapter 7 – Meat Sweats
Chapter 8 – Bag of Dicks
Chapter 9 – Pee Hand
Chapter 10 – Titillating Tube Socks
Chapter 11 – Handy
Chapter 12 – Dammit, Ian
Chapter 13 – Shocker Honor
Chapter 14 – I Have a Vagerie
Chapter 15 – Ganja Grandma
Chapter 16 – Fuck Betty White
Chapter 17 – Lips, Tongue, Penis, Suck
Chapter 18 – Hairball
Chapter 19 – Poop Sex
Chapter 20 – Pez Penis
Chapter 21 – Drunk Babies
Chapter 22 – Pumpkin Roll Punany
Chapter 23 – Smell the Meat
Epilogue
Acknowledgements
Prologue
Molly
There is a phrase in the English language that I believe should be banned for all of time. Two little words that will fuck up life as you know it and make everyone around you certifiably insane.
“I’m pregnant.”
You just shuddered a little didn’t you? A small chill wound its way up your spine, your eyes got wide, and you looked over your shoulder like a monster might be standing there waiting to rip your head off. Maybe you even put your hand to your stomach and said, “Awe, shit.” It could be out of sympathy for the words you just read or maybe it’s real. You could be knocked up right now and not even know it. If you are currently with child…my condolences are yours for the taking. I mean, sure, once the baby gets here you’ll probably be happy, but you have nine months—give or take—of people riding full speed ahead on the crazy train and dragging you with them.
I had a good life. No, I had a GREAT life before I uttered those stupid words. Twenty years old, almost finished with my two-year accelerated program in culinary school, and perfectly content staying hidden in the background around my nut-job family. I learned at an early age to keep my mouth shut so I’d have a good chance at never being publicly humiliated by them. It worked great until a couple of months ago when I just HAD to open my mouth and make my presence known.
My older sister, Charlotte, seems to think all of this is a great “learning experience” for me. Of course she would say that considering everything that happened is HER fault, but I guess she sort of has a point. I definitely came out of my shell in the last eight weeks. For the past two years I’d done nothing but eat, sleep, and breathe culinary school. When I finished and finally had some free time, I got a life. It was a fake life for the most part, but hey, at least it was a life.
Unfortunately at this point, I’d much rather still be the girl who spent two years secretly daydreaming about her pastry chef instructor and what he would do if she walked up to him and swiped the flour off of his cheek that always seemed to be there.
Luckily, I got to find out what would happen when I did that. I also got to find out a lot of things about my instructor and what he would do, like lie right to my face about something extremely important—and after I let him make me a non-partial virgin, too! But at least we had a few good weeks. That poor guy put up with a lot—a black eye, everyone knowing how he masturbates, me puking on his brand new chef coat, learning things about afterbirth he probably never, ever wanted to know, eating an actual bag of dicks…oh yeah, and telling everyone he was the father of my baby that wasn’t really my baby without even knowing that the baby wasn’t my baby because he’s just a damn good guy. You know, if he wasn’t such a liar-face liar pants.
So, this is the story all about how my life got flipped-turned upside down…no, seriously, it is. Stop singing, you heartless bastards.
I’m pregnant.
Those words can just fuck right off.
Chapter 1
– Can I Get A Woohoo?! –
Molly
“If you whip and fold in the egg whites last, you’ll get the best volume in your finished soufflé.”
Listening to the deep timber of my pastry instructor’s voice as he wanders around the test kitchen, I pause with my whisk in my hand and imagine Marco Desoto naked for probably the thousandth time. Today.