I grabbed my purse and the box of stink bombs, and we hustled down the road, with Lula in the lead holding her flashlight.
“Boy, Bobby Sunflower is a really unpopular person,” Lula said. “You gotta get in line to bomb his house.”
We were walking fast. I was sweating holding the box of stink bombs, and I could hear Lula breathing hard in front of me. We were almost to Lower Buck’s Road when we heard the sirens.
“Crap,” Connie said. “How did they get here so fast?”
I hiked my bag farther up on my shoulder. “I’m sure the house had a security system, and fire always goes directly to police and the fire department.”
A police car was the first on the scene. It turned onto the dirt road, and we jumped into the woods. A second car was close behind, but it stopped on Lower Buck’s Road, behind Connie’s SUV.
“I’m screwed,” Connie said.
The cop sat in his car for what seemed like an eternity. Finally, the driver’s door opened, and the cop got out and walked to Connie’s car. A beam of light swept over the SUV. We held our breath and didn’t move. A fire truck chugged past and turned onto the dirt road. It was followed by an EMT truck. The cop returned to his car, pulled onto the road, and turned into the dirt road.
Connie called the Trenton police and reported her brother’s car stolen.
“I parked it at Quakerbridge Mall,” she said. “And I just came out of Macy’s, and it’s not here.”
She gave all the necessary information and said she had a ride coming and needed to get home.
“That was quick thinking,” Lula said. “It wouldn’t be good if Bobby Sunflower found out we were parked here. He’d think we were the fire bombers. The police probably would think that, too.”
“Unfortunately, we can’t use the car to get home,” Connie said. “We’re going to have to leave it here.”
“I bet your brother’s gonna be pissed,” Lula said.
Connie shrugged. “He’ll understand.”
Connie’s family took crime in stride. It was a family activity.
“So how we gonna get home?” Lula wanted to know. “It’s getting late, and I got television shows I want to watch.”
“My brother Tony would pick us up but his car’s on the side of the road,” Connie said.
“I got no one,” Lula said. “I don’t got a special someone in my life right now.”
I shoved my hand into my pocket and came up with Mooner’s card.
____________________
THE RV CREAKED to a stop behind Connie’s SUV and Mooner leaned out the driver’s side window. “Have no fear, Mooner’s here,” he said.
“What the heck is this?” Lula said, taking in the hand-painted peace signs, swirly wind, and stars symbols on the side of the bus.
“It’s a motor home,” Mooner said. “It’s a quality recreational vehicle.”
Connie sniffed the air drifting out the open window. “It smells like dog.”
“Yep,” Mooner said. “And it comes by it honest.”
We scrambled inside and looked for a place to sit. The walls were covered in velvet-like leopard-print fabric. The couches and chairs were upholstered in fuzzy faux zebra. The tabletop and kitchen counter were red Formica. Even in the dark of night, it was a migraine.
“This here’s real nice,” Lula said. “Surprisingly plush. ’Course, I’m a animal-print person, myself, so I appreciate the decor.”
“I did it myself,” Mooner said. “I was going for retro animal kingdom.” Mooner ground the RV into gear, performed a U-turn at the dirt road, and headed back to Trenton. “Were you ladies attending the bonfire?” he asked. “It has to be mega. I could see the glow from the bridge.”
“We didn’t go to the bonfire,” I told him. “We were just riding around and the car broke down.”
“I could turn this bus around and take you to the fire if you want,” Mooner said.
“Not necessary,” I told him. “You’ve seen one fire, you’ve seen them all.”
“So true,” Mooner said. “Personally, I’m more a wind man. Wind rocks.”
Mooner dropped Connie off at her brother’s house, so she could retrieve her car, and he took Lula and me back to the bonds office. Lula got into her Firebird and drove away, and I walked back to the Jeep, where Morelli was waiting for me. He was lounging against the Jeep, arms crossed over his chest.
“Hey,” I said. “What’s up?”
“You were asking about Bobby Sunflower, so I thought you’d want to know one of his properties burned to the ground tonight.”
“Which one burned?”
“His Pennyslvania house.”
“Was anyone in the house?”
“It’s too early to tell. No one was rescued.” Morelli wrapped me in his arms and nuzzled my hair. “You smell smoky,” he said.
“Must be from Mooner’s motor home. He took us for a demo ride.”
“It’s not nice to lie,” Morelli said.
Our eyes locked.
“Do you honestly want the truth?” I asked him.
Morelli thought about it for a beat. “No,” he said.
I stood on tiptoes and kissed him on the nose. “It’s late. I have to go home. I have a big day of bounty huntering tomorrow.”
His arms were still locked around me. “I could go home with you.”
“You’d go home with someone who might be a liar?”
“Yeah,” Morelli said. “I’m getting desperate.”
“You were the one who wanted to break up. You said I wasn’t relationship material.”
“I didn’t say that.”
“You did!”
“Can I take it back? I hadn’t had my coffee yet. And I needed…”
I narrowed my eyes at him. “You needed what?”
“Toast,” Morelli said. He blew out a sigh. “This isn’t going to happen tonight, is it?”
“No.”
I was getting mad all over again. No one pushed my buttons like Morelli. I mean, why was I the one who had to remember to buy the bread? Okay, in all honesty, I thought this was a pretty stupid thing to break up over. And in all honesty, I should have remembered to buy bread. That didn’t alter the fact that I was mad. Mad wasn’t a reasonable emotion. And the truth was, I wasn’t entirely sure if I was mad at Morelli or mad at myself.
TEN
I ROLLED INTO the bonds office at nine o’clock. Connie was at her desk. Lula hadn’t as yet arrived.
“Have you heard anything about the fire?” I asked Connie.
“So far, no bodies found. Word on the street is there’s a war going on between Bobby Sunflower and some under-the-radar Mob guy.”
“Did your brother get his car back?”
“He’s picking it up from impound today. The police suspect it was stolen by someone associated with the fire.”
“Only tangentially.”
“That’s a big word,” Connie said.
“I heard it on television. I’m pretty sure I used it right.”
The phone rang, and Connie answered. “Yeah,” she said to the caller. “I understand.” She hung up and looked at me. “That was a reminder that we have two days left to come up with the money. And it’s now grown to a million one.”
“At least we know Vinnie didn’t burn up in the house.”
“Looks that way. I suppose it’s a good thing, although I’m starting to think it might be easier just to look for a new job.”
Lula bustled in. “What’d I miss? Did I miss anything? I overslept. And then I couldn’t figure out what to wear. And my coffeepot’s broke, so I had to stop at Starbucks, and the line was out the door.”
“We found out Vinnie didn’t burn up in the house,” I told her.
“Hunh,” Lula said. “But then on the bright side, since he isn’t dead, we might get to use the stink bomb after all.”
“Every cloud has a silver lining,” Connie said.
“You got bags under your eyes,” Lula said to me. “You spend the night with Morelli?”
“No. We’re in the off-again phase of our on-again, off-again relationship,” I told her. “It was just one of those sleepless nights.”
I had bags under my eyes because I’d thrashed around all night in a state over bread. And then I was in a state because I had two men in my life, and I had no clue what to do with them. I loved them each in different ways, and I was too traditional and Catholic to just enjoy them. How sick is that? I wasn’t a practicing Catholic, but I had guilt. And I was stuck with all these rules about relationships. And then there was my mother, who I suspect was mortally afraid I’d end up with Ranger. And my grandmother, who probably thought I was an idiot not to be sleeping with both of them. And my father, who didn’t think there was a man alive who was worthy of me. So I’d probably gotten about an hour’s sleep last night. And then Chet had called at seven o’clock. Midmorning for Ranger’s team.